“Lonely as f***” S01.5E1 part 2 | A fan fiction based on Issa Rae’s INSECURE on HBO

image of insecure's issa rae looking lonely as f

Issa didn’t sleep at all that night, and by 4AM she knew she wasn’t going to make it to work. The problem is that, she called off seven times in the past month, and she was running out of excuses.

So far, she had a stomach virus, a tape worm, car trouble, a check up, to wait for the cable guy, a dead cat, to call in Black because of a police shooting…

The truth was that she blamed herself for Lawrence leaving. No matter how much she tried to convince herself that he was no good, the whole situation ate her up inside.

Around 5AM, she went to her bathroom mirror and took a deep breath, “I don’t need this,” she began to rap with attempted conviction.

“I don’t need this…he ain’t worth sh**, I’ll be rising up with my gat and my clip…”

Her eyes furrowed and she looked down at the sink, “Oh my god, that’s so violent.” She shook her head and took another deep breath.

“OK…I can do this…” she reassured herself.

“I’m not taking this…I’m not a b****. I just wanna….quit,” she stared at her reflection in the mirror with the sad realization of what needed to happen.

“I’m quitting my job,” Issa said on the phone.

“It’s 5AM, Issa. I thought you were dying,” said her good friend Tiffany on the other end.

“I am,” said Issa. “…on the inside. I’ve lost my mojo.”

“Who’s mojo?” asked Tiffany.

“I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. My flow is real basic now,” Issa complained.

“Flow?”

“It’s this rap thing that I do to pump myself…you know what, never mind.”

“Issa, you’re obviously stressed about Lawrence…”

“Don’t say his name…”

“My mother always told me, never make rash decisions right after a break up. Don’t get no tattoos, don’t cut your hair, and DEFINITELY don’t quit your job, because you’ll regret it.”

“Then, what am I supposed to do?” argued Issa.

“Just take a few weeks off,” Tiffany said.

“Them non-profits don’t give vacation days like that. I used them all up for my birthday,” Issa complained.

“I don’t know, Issa,” yawned Tiffany. “You’ll figure it out.”

“Baby, come back to bed,” Tiffany’s husband was heard saying in the background.

“Issa, I gotta go take my morning dose of Vitamin D,” Tiffany whispered.

“Ew,” Issa grimaced.

“Bye.”

The beep followed by silence told Issa that Tiffany had hung up.

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